Tag: Commitment love

Virtue Love in the Christian

As Christians, our love for one another should be obvious to others. On the night before His crucifixion, Jesus told His disciples, “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another” (John 13:34-35). Other passages inform us, “you yourselves are taught by God to love one another” (1 Th 4:9b), and “keep fervent in your love for one another” (1 Pet 4:8a), and “this is the message which you have heard from the beginning, that we should love one another” (1 John 3:11), and “This is His commandment, that we believe in the name of His Son Jesus Christ, and love one another, just as He commanded us” (1 John 3:23), and “Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. 8 The one who does not love does not know God, for God is love” (1 John 4:7-8). In each of these biblical passages, the word love translates the Greek verb ἀγαπάω agapao, which means we value others by seeking God’s best in their lives, seeking to build them up and to meet their needs as we have opportunity.

God’s love should also be extended to those who hate and mistreat us. God has unconditional love for everyone, which means He does them good and blesses them. This is virtue love. Though God’s love is innate to Him, it is not natural to us, since we are fallen and marked by sin. Our innate personal love can never rise above our particular likes. But, once saved, we are to learn about God’s love—virtue love—and then model it in our lives to others. Virtue love must be learned. The apostle Paul, when writing to his friend, Timothy, said, “the goal of our instruction is love from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith” (1 Tim 1:5). And Paul described virtue love, saying, “Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails.” (1 Cor 13:4-8a). As we advance spiritually in our walk with God, we can learn to love as He loves.

We Love Because He First Loved UsVirtue love and personal love are distinct. Personal love is based on an individual’s particular likes and affections, which fluctuate and change. Personal love is no greater than the person whose desires and feelings vacillate. Virtue love is greater, because it is tied to God and His love. God’s love is stable, constant, sacrificial, and does good to everyone. Virtue love is based on God’s truth. True love requires truth, otherwise, it becomes a lesser form of love that is subject to personal whims. According to R. B. Thieme Jr., “For human love to succeed, God’s perfect, unchanging truth must be the source, pattern, and basis of that love. Mankind can truly love only by possessing the virtue that derives from God Himself (1 John 4:9–10).”[1] Virtue love manifests itself toward others in a thoughtful and sacrificial way and is not based on the beauty or worth of the object. Scripture reveals, “For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life” (John 3:16). This is a sacrificial love, for “God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us” (Rom 5:8). And “In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins” (1 John 4:10). John concludes, saying, “Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another” (1 John 4:11). Our love for others is borne out of God’s love for us.

Operating on virtue love does not mean we expose ourselves to unnecessary harm (1 Ki 18:13; John 8:59; Acts 9:23-25; 2 Tim 4:14-15), nor that we trust all people (John 2:23-24), nor fail to rebuke others when needed (Matt 16:21-23; Luke 9:51-55), nor that we interact or befriend people who are hostile to God (Prov 13:20; 20:19; 22:24-25; 24:21; 1 Cor 5:9-11; 15:33; 2 Tim 3:1-5), nor forfeit the right to defend ourselves physically or legally when we come under attack (Acts 22:25-29; 25:7-12). And when we are attacked, it’s alright to be angry. Paul wrote, “Be angry, and yet do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger” (Eph 4:26). And it’s alright to be hurt, but never to hate (Luke 6:27-28).

Personal love, weak as it is, is our default setting from the flesh. Virtue love is acquired over time as we learn about God through His Word and follow His directives. Virtue love operates fully and effectively even toward those hate us and seek our harm. Jesus demands this kind of love from His disciples, saying, “I say to you who hear, love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, 28 bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you” (Luke 6:27-28). All four of Jesus’ directives (to love, do good, bless, and pray) are in the imperative mood, which means they are commands to be understood and obeyed. These directives are consciously in our minds and actively obeyed as we direct our wills to seek God’s best in the lives of others. To do good to those who hate us means we are kind and generous when possible. To bless our enemies means we wish them well rather than harm. To pray for our enemies means we ask God to save and bless them, even though they seek to mistreat us. In all this, we are never to return evil for evil (see Rom 12:14, 17-21; 1 Th 5:15; 1 Pet 3:9). This is not mere passivity, but requires great discipline of the mind and will, which can be contrary to our emotions. Nor does such behavior imply weakness on our part. Jesus, the theanthropic person, possessed all power sufficient to destroy His enemies, yet He restrained His power for the sake of love and grace.

In the Gospel of Matthew, Jesus said, “I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, 45 so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven; for He causes His sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous” (Matt 5:44-45). Divine truth, not feelings, must be what guides our thoughts, words, and actions. As Christians, when we think and act this way, we are like the “sons of the Most-High; for He Himself is kind to ungrateful and evil men” (Luke 6:35). Paul, when speaking to unbelievers, said of the Father, “He did not leave Himself without witness, in that He did good and gave you rains from heaven and fruitful seasons, satisfying your hearts with food and gladness” (Acts 14:17). That’s love. And in Galatians, Paul said, “So then, while we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, and especially to those who are of the household of the faith” (Gal 6:10). God’s love for everyone is our pattern to follow. This is not personal love, but virtue love. This kind of love and behavior is accomplished by faith and not feelings. Though we can’t always change our feelings, we must not be governed by them; rather, God’s Word must be the driving force that directs our thoughts, words, and actions. As we grow spiritually, God’s love will become more and more seated in our thoughts, and as we submit ourselves to Him and walk in the Spirit, His love will begin to shine forth toward others and we will seek God’s best in their lives. Let us love others as God directs, based on the truth of His Word, and after the pattern of Himself and our Savior, Jesus. In this way, we will adhere to Paul’s instruction, in which he says, “Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children; 2 and walk in love, just as Christ also loved you and gave Himself up for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God as a fragrant aroma” (Eph 5:1-2).

Dr. Steven R. Cook

Related Articles:

[1] R. B. Thieme Jr., “Virtue Love” in Thieme’s Bible Doctrine Dictionary, (Houston, TX., R. B. Thieme, Jr., Bible Ministries, 2022), p, 285.

Commitment Love

Love is often described as an emotion, a warm feeling toward another person. Webster’s Dictionary defines love as a “strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties…warm attachment, enthusiasm.”[1] This works in some ways, when the object of our affection appeals to us. But when the natural affinity is gone, or the object becomes unattractive, indifferent, or hostile, emotional love fails.

There is a higher form of love that supersedes emotion. A love that derives from the individual and has little or no regard for the appeal or worth of the object. It is a love that is born out of the bounty of one’s own goodness and is marked by stability and commitment. This love always seeks the best interests of others at one’s own expense, and is not often understood or appreciated. It is this higher form of love that is described and promoted in the Bible. The Bible reveals God loves us, and we are to love Him and others.

God revealed His attribute of love to Moses, saying, “The LORD, the LORD God, compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in lovingkindness [חֶסֶד chesed] and truth; who keeps lovingkindness [חֶסֶד chesed] for thousands, who forgives iniquity, transgression and sin” (Exo 34:6-7a). According to HALOT, the Hebrew word חֶסֶד chesed denotes “lasting loyalty, faithfulness…to show loyalty.”[2] Here, God’s loyalty means He keeps His covenant promises to His people. God is faithful to His Word (see Psa 89:1-4; cf. Tit 1:2; Heb 6:18).

Another word for love in the OT is the Hebrew verb אָהַב ahav. An example is found in Deuteronomy 6:5 where Moses wrote, “You shall love [אָהֵב aheb] the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might.” (Deut 6:5). Here, love is an act of the will in which Israelites were to commit themselves to the Lord wholeheartedly. Concerning the word love in this passage, Daniel Block writes:

Speaking biblically “love” is not merely an emotion, a pleasant disposition toward another person, but covenant commitment demonstrated in actions that seek the interest of the next person…Just as in marriage true love is demonstrated not merely or even primarily by roses and verbal utterances of “I love you,” but in actions that seek the well-being and delight of one’s spouse.[3]

Warren Wiersbe adds:

In the life of the believer, love is an act of the will: we choose to relate to God and to other persons in a loving way no matter how we may feel. Christian love simply means that we treat others the way God treats us. In His love, God is kind and forgiving toward us, so we seek to be kind and forgiving toward others (Eph. 4:32). God wills the very best for us, so we desire the very best for others, even if it demands sacrifice on our part.[4]

The idea of commitment-love carries into the New Testament where Jesus tells His disciples, “If you love [ἀγαπάω agapao] Me, you will keep My commandments” (John 14:15). Love for Jesus means we are committed to Him above all else, and this commitment is manifest in a life of obedience to Him and service to others. Biblical love for others is not primarily an emotion; rather, it’s a choice to commit ourselves to them and to seek God’s best in their lives.

As Christians, God wants us to walk with Him and enjoy His love and blessings. Our obedience is motivated by His love for us. The apostle John set the order when he wrote, “we love [ἀγαπάω agapao], because He first loved us” (1 John 4:19). And God loved us when we were helpless, ungodly, sinners and enemies (Rom 5:6-10). The apostle Paul wrote, “God demonstrates His own love [ἀγάπη agape] toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us” (Rom 5:8). Jesus tells us to love our enemies.

You have heard that it was said, ‘you shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, love [ἀγαπάω agapao] your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven; for He causes His sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. (Matt 5:43-45)

But love [ἀγαπάω agapao] your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return; and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High; for He Himself is kind to ungrateful and evil men. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.” (Luke 6:35-36)

This command cannot be obeyed if love is an emotion, for one cannot conjure up a warm affection for the one who hates us and causes injury. Emotions are part of what it means to be human. I like my emotions very much, although there are times they get in the way of good judgment and right decisions. The truth is, emotions are unintelligent. They never operate on their own, but are always tied to thoughts or actions. Emotion follows thought like a trailer follows a truck. The trailer goes where the truck goes.

Being unintelligent, emotion does not differentiate between reality or fiction. I can watch a TV show, or read a book, and have an emotional response that is triggered by fictional characters and events. I can even produce a story in my own mind that is completely fictional and have an emotional response. If I want to change my emotions, I need to change my thoughts or actions.

Emotion Follows Thought

Emotional love is not in view when Jesus commands us to love our enemies. Rather, it is commitment love, in which we seek God’s best in the lives of others. Warren Wiersbe states:

Jesus defined our enemies as those who curse us, hate us, and exploit us selfishly. Since Christian love is an act of the will, and not simply an emotion, He has the right to command us to love our enemies. After all, He loved us when we were His enemies (Rom 5:10). We may show this love by blessing those who curse us, doing good to them, and praying for them. When we pray for our enemies, we find it easier to love them. It takes the “poison” out of our attitudes.[5]

William MacDonald adds:

Jesus announces that we are to love our enemies and to pray for those who persecute us. The fact that love is commanded shows that it is a matter of the will and not primarily of the emotions. It is not the same as natural affection because it is not natural to love those who hate and harm you.[6]

Now, let me be careful here. Loving our enemies does not necessarily mean we expose ourselves to their hostilities. There are clear examples in Scripture where God’s people hid themselves from their enemies. For example, Rahab protected the two spies that came to her house, for “she had brought them up to the roof and hidden them in the stalks of flax which she had laid in order on the roof” (Josh 2:6; cf. Heb 11:31). Obadiah hid one hundred prophets of the Lord and provided food and water for them (1 Ki 18:1-4). These were true prophets, for a false prophet would not have been afraid of the public hostility of Ahab and Jezebel. There were at least two occasions when Jesus “hid Himself” from an attack by the Jewish leadership (John 8:59; John 12:36). Certainly, there was no sin in Jesus’ action.

Furthermore, it’s valid to warn others of enemies who may attack and cause unnecessary harm. When writing to his friend Timothy, the apostle Paul warned him about a dangerous man who hurt him. Paul wrote, “Alexander the coppersmith did me much harm; the Lord will repay him according to his deeds. Be on guard against him yourself, for he vigorously opposed our teaching” (2 Tim 4:14-15). Paul did not state what the specific harm was, but clearly he’d been marked by his encounter with Alexander and carried the memory of the hurt. As a Christian, Paul did not seek revenge against Alexander, but rather, put the matter in the Lord’s hands, saying, “the Lord will repay with him according to his deeds” (2 Tim 4:14b). Because God is the one who dispenses justice, we are commanded, “Never take your own revenge, beloved, but leave room for the wrath of God, for it is written, ‘Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,’ says the Lord” (Rom 12:19). Paul knew God would deal with Alexander in His own time and way and that the punishment would be equitable payment for the harm done to him. There should be no hatred in the heart of the Christian. As Christians, we are never called to seek revenge upon those who have hurt us, but rather, to put the matter in the Lord’s hands. Scripture teaches that God repays people according to their actions, as Paul wrote, “it is only just for God to repay with affliction those who afflict you” (2 Th 1:6).

In summary, biblical love for others is not primarily an emotion; rather, it’s a choice to commit ourselves to them and to seek God’s best in their lives. Love is manifest by prayer, sharing the Gospel with the lost, sharing biblical truth to edify believers, open handed giving to the needy, and supporting Christian ministries that do God’s work, just to name a few.

Dr. Steven R. Cook

Related Articles:

[1] Merriam-Webster, Merriam-Webster’s Collegiate Dictionary (Springfield, MA: Merriam-Webster, 1996).

[2] Ludwig Koehler et al., The Hebrew and Aramaic Lexicon of the Old Testament (Leiden: E.J. Brill, 1994–2000), 336.

[3] Daniel I. Block, The NIV Application Commentary: Deuteronomy (Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 2012), 189–190.

[4] Warren W. Wiersbe, Be Equipped, “Be” Commentary Series (Colorado Springs, CO: Chariot Victor Pub., 1999), 46.

[5] Warren W. Wiersbe, The Bible Exposition Commentary, vol. 1 (Wheaton, IL: Victor Books, 1996), 24.

[6] William MacDonald, Believer’s Bible Commentary: Old and New Testaments, ed. Arthur Farstad (Nashville: Thomas Nelson, 1995), 1223.