Category Archives: Family

A Simple Life, A Rich Spirit

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I loved my grandmother. I knew her only for a short time when I was a young boy growing up in southern California, but she left a lasting impact on my life. Though she had her flaws, she was to me a model of godliness. My grandmother was financially poor, yet she was rich in her daily walk with the Lord. She delighted in the study of God’s Word, worshiped the Lord, fellowshipped with growing Christians, loved others genuinely, shared the gospel, gave of herself so others might be edified, and practiced the discipline of living simply. She was not burdened by what she lacked but was content with what the Lord had provided. Though her means were modest, her spirit was abundant, for her walk with God shaped her outlook far more than her circumstances ever did. Her life demonstrated that happiness flows not from possessions but from a heart that rests in the Lord.

This kind of contentment accords with the biblical pattern described by the apostle Paul. He wrote, “Not that I speak from want, for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am. I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need. I can do all things through Him who strengthens me” (Phil 4:11-13). Paul’s testimony reveals that contentment is not bound to external situations but flows from the sufficiency of Christ, who empowers the believer to endure and rejoice in every condition.

To be strengthened by Christ is to possess a stability of mind and heart that transcends circumstances. Those who operate by divine viewpoint learn to appreciate life’s simple blessings with gratitude, no longer enslaved to discontentment or comparison. In this way, Paul’s words illuminate my grandmother’s life, for her contentment was not accidental but the result of knowing Christ’s sustaining power. Her example reflects the wisdom of Solomon, who said, “Better is a little with the fear of the Lord than great treasure and turmoil with it” (Prov 15:16). True contentment rests not in what one owns but in Christ, who is sufficient for every need.

My grandmother’s life was a quiet testimony that true wealth is measured not in possessions but in the presence of Christ. Though the world might have seen her as poor, she was rich in the things that matter most—faith, love, and contentment in the Lord. Her example continues to remind me that Christ is sufficient for every circumstance, and that the believer who walks with Him enjoys a joy and stability the world cannot give or take away. Her godly life continues to bless me, and I thank God for both her and the pattern of life she modeled.

Steven R. Cook, D.Min., M.Div.

If this article has enriched your understanding and walk with Christ, and you feel led to support my ministry, your generosity is greatly appreciated. Your gifts enable me to continue sharing the gospel of grace and providing in-depth biblical teachings. Thank you for partnering with me in this mission.

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Vertical and Horizontal Confession

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Biblically speaking, there are two kinds of confession: vertical confession to God and horizontal confession to people. Vertical confession is a private matter between us and the Lord. The forgiveness we seek in this instance is familial, not judicial. Judicial forgiveness refers to God’s once-for-all act of pardoning all our sins at the moment of faith in Christ, securing our eternal standing as justified believers (John 5:24; Rom 3:28; 8:1). Familial forgiveness, on the other hand, concerns the ongoing restoration of our fellowship with God as our heavenly Father when we confess our post-salvation sins (1 John 1:9).

As Christians, when we sin, we break fellowship with God (1 John 1:5–7). What is lost is not our salvation—which remains secure and permanent (John 10:28)—but fellowship. Sin grieves the Holy Spirit (Eph 4:30), violates God’s righteous standard (1 John 3:4), and leaves us functioning according to the sin nature (1 Cor 3:1–3). Yet God, in His grace, has provided a simple and powerful means for us to receive familial forgiveness and be restored to fellowship and the filling of the Holy Spirit: confession. God promises, “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9; cf. Psa 32:5).

Confession is simple: we name the sin to God—without excuses, without bargaining, and without dramatic performances. No crawling across the floor. No endless weeping to prove we mean it. We are simply honest with God. At the moment we confess, forgiveness is granted, cleansing takes place, and fellowship between the Father and His child is restored. This happens whether we feel different or not. God said that if we confess our sins to Him, “He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9). Faith is to trust God at His Word. He said it; He will do it. He cannot lie. We accept His forgiveness by faith, not by feelings.

In divine forgiveness, God may sometimes eliminate the consequences of sin, but not always. In His grace and sovereignty, God may choose to remove or lessen the consequences as part of His mercy, as seen in the case of David’s sin with Bathsheba (2 Sam 12:13). However, there are instances when the natural consequences of sin remain, even after forgiveness, because they serve a purpose in God’s discipline and our spiritual growth. For example, while David was forgiven, the death of his child still occurred as a result of his sin (2 Sam 12:14). This demonstrates that while God forgives and restores fellowship, the consequences of sin may still be part of His disciplinary process. Likewise, in 1 Corinthians 11:32, Paul writes that God disciplines believers for their sins so that they will not be condemned with the world, indicating that God’s discipline often serves as a means of sanctification. The key distinction is that while God’s forgiveness restores our fellowship with Him, the consequences, if not removed, remain part of the process of sanctification (Jam 1:2-4) or divine discipline (Heb 12:6).

The second kind of confession is horizontal: confession to people. This is a relational issue between human beings. When we sin against someone—whether by lying, stealing, slandering, or deceiving—we have not only offended God but also injured our neighbor. Jesus taught that before we waltz down the center aisle with our offerings, we need to go make things right with our brother (Matt 5:23-24). James also emphasizes the importance of confession among believers when he writes, “Therefore, confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another so that you may be healed” (Jam 5:16), highlighting the role of mutual honesty and prayer in maintaining spiritual health within the body of Christ. Confession to people involves humbly admitting the wrong, asking for forgiveness, and making restitution when necessary. And importantly, we keep the confession limited to the person we sinned against. There is no need to turn it into a public spectacle; we address it directly and appropriately. Horizontal confession promotes peace, restores relationships, and prevents bitterness from taking root and growing into spiritual cancer (Heb 12:15). Sometimes the right moment for confession is immediate; other times, it requires prayerful patience and wisdom. We cannot control the other person’s response, but we are responsible for confessing when necessary, trusting God with the outcome.

A Difference in Outcome

Vertical and horizontal confession are both biblical, but they differ in direction, purpose, and outcome. Vertical confession is directed to God alone and always results in forgiveness, cleansing, and restoration of fellowship (1 John 1:9). God is faithful and unchanging—His grace never fails. We confess. He forgives. Period. Horizontal confession, on the other hand, is directed toward people whom we have wronged. It is relational, and its purpose is to seek reconciliation and peace within the human sphere (Matt 5:23–24; Jam 5:16). But unlike God, people are not always ready to forgive. Sometimes they respond with grace and reconciliation; other times with silence, anger, or rejection. The outcomes of horizontal confession are uncertain and dependent on the will of the other person. With God, the issue is always resolved when we confess; with people, we obey God by confessing, but we entrust the results to Him. Our responsibility is honesty, humility, and obedience; the other person’s response is between them and the Lord.

Conclusion

In conclusion, both vertical and horizontal confession play crucial roles in the believer’s life, but they serve different purposes and yield different outcomes. Vertical confession restores our fellowship with God and secures forgiveness, as it is based on His unchanging faithfulness (Psa 32:5; 1 John 1:9). This process is always certain, for God’s forgiveness is not contingent upon our feelings or external circumstances. Horizontal confession, however, is a relational matter that seeks reconciliation with others and healing within the body of Christ (Matt 5:23–24; Jam 5:16). While God is always ready to forgive, people may not always respond with the same grace, and the outcomes are not guaranteed. Nonetheless, whether confessing to God or to others, our responsibility remains the same: to confess honestly, humbly, and with a sincere desire for reconciliation, trusting God with the outcome, whether or not the consequences of our sin are removed.

Steven R. Cook, D.Min., M.Div.

If this article has enriched your understanding and walk with Christ, and you feel led to support my ministry, your generosity is greatly appreciated. Your gifts enable me to continue sharing the gospel of grace and providing in-depth biblical teachings. Thank you for partnering with me in this mission.

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The Ideal Man

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Biblically, the ideal man is not autonomous but God-dependent. He is not ruled by selfish pride but shaped by humility, truth, and obedience to God. He devotes himself to the study of God’s Word (Psa 1:2; 2 Tim 2:15)—not merely to gain knowledge, but to know the Author and live wisely. He chooses wise friends and avoids fools (Prov 13:20). With a heart inclined toward obedience, he treasures Scripture as a lamp to his feet and a light to his path (Psa 119:105). He doesn’t separate theology from life but seeks to apply biblical truth to his thinking, relationships, work, and worship (Jam 1:22-25). For him, Bible doctrine is fuel for devotion, direction, and transformation. His convictions are rooted in truth, and his worldview is shaped by divine revelation, not cultural trends. If he leads in business, sports, or the military, he does so as a servant-leader—exercising authority with integrity, humility, and a view to the good of others (Mark 10:42-45).

He is a man who fears the Lord and walks in His ways (Psa 128:1). He is both strong and submissive—strong in character, yet submitted to God’s authority. He doesn’t worship himself but worships God with reverence and love (Deut 6:5). He doesn’t demand his own way but seeks the will of God above his own (Luke 22:42). At the heart level, he is marked by humility (Mic 6:8), gratitude for grace (Col 3:15), and confidence in God’s faithfulness (Prov 3:5-6). His identity is anchored in who God declares him to be—not in fleeting feelings or worldly achievements. He honors his parents (Ex 20:12; Eph 6:2) and makes personal sacrifices to care for them in their old age (Mark 7:10-13; 1 Tim 5:4). If married, he is committed to love, lead, and protect his wife (Eph 5:25-29; Col 3:19; 1 Pet 3:7); and if he has children, he raises them to love and obey the Lord (Eph 6:4; Deut 6:6-7; Prov 22:6).

His life reflects these attitudes in concrete behaviors. He is slow to anger (Prov 19:11) and quick to forgive (Eph 4:32; Jam 1:19-20). He speaks the truth in love (Eph 4:15) and stewards his time, talents, and resources faithfully (1 Cor 4:2). He takes personal responsibility (Gal 6:5) and remains teachable (Prov 9:9). He serves others—not out of guilt or legalism, but out of freedom and love (Gal 5:13). He walks by faith, not by sight (2 Cor 5:7), and lives in light of eternity (2 Cor 4:17-18). Even in trials, he clings to hope, trusting that God is using every moment to shape him more into the image of Christ.

The one word that best summarizes the ideal man from a biblical perspective is Christlike. This term encompasses the full scope of godly masculinity—dependence on the Father, humility of heart, strength under control, sacrificial love, devotion to truth, servant leadership, and dedicated obedience (John 13:15; 1 Cor 11:1; Phil 2:5-8). The aim of spiritual maturity is to be “conformed to the image of His Son” (Rom 8:29), making Christ Himself the standard for true manhood. His life becomes a living testimony to truth, love, and grace, revealing the transforming power of God’s Word and the spiritual life in both public and private spheres.

Dr. Steven R. Cook

If this article has enriched your understanding and walk with Christ, and you feel led to support my ministry, your generosity is greatly appreciated. Your gifts enable me to continue sharing the gospel of grace and providing in-depth biblical teachings. Thank you for partnering with me in this mission.

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All Babies Go to Heaven When They Die

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All babies and little children go to heaven when they die because they have not reached the age of accountability, the point at which they can be held responsible for their choices. The age of accountability refers to the stage in life when an individual gains the capacity to recognize the existence of God, understand moral accountability, and respond to the Gospel. Since children mature at different rates, this age may vary depending on factors such as mental development, life circumstances, and geographical context. However, it generally occurs sometime after early childhood. This doctrine reflects the understanding that God, in His perfect grace and justice, holds people accountable only for decisions they are mentally capable of making. Because babies and the mentally impaired are unable to understand sin or their need for a Savior, they are graciously covered by God’s provision until they reach the stage where personal accountability becomes possible. Romans 1:19-20 affirms that God makes His existence evident to people at a level they can comprehend, further reinforcing the idea that His justice accommodates varying capacities.

This biblical teaching is a theological extrapolation that is born out of certain passages of Scripture. For example, Moses wrote of “little ones… have no knowledge of good or evil” (Deut 1:39). And God spoke of Isaiah’s son, Shear-jashub (Isa 7:3), that “before the boy will know enough to refuse evil and choose good, the land whose two kings you [Ahaz] dread will be forsaken” (Isa 7:16). According to Geisler, “These texts seem to imply that there is an age of moral accountability. Even of adults, Jesus said, ‘If you were blind, you would not be guilty of sin; but now that you claim you can see, your guilt remains’ (John 9:41). How much more would this apply to infants who cannot yet know right from wrong.”[1] Another revealing passage is found in 2 Chronicles where we’re told, “Jehoiachin was eight years old when he became king, and he reigned three months and ten days in Jerusalem, and he did evil in the sight of the LORD” (2 Ch 36:9). Here we see an eight year old whose actions were called “evil in the sight of the LORD.” It reveals that an eight year old with normal cognitive function could be held morally responsible for his actions before the Lord.

Moral accountability before God seems to assume normal sensory and cognitive function, such that a person who has the sensory and intellectual capacity to know that God exists through creation (Psa 19:1-2; Rom 1:18), can then make a decision to pursue Him, or to “suppress the truth in unrighteousness” (Rom 1:18). It would seem that those who suffer from an intellectual or developmental disability (i.e., Down syndrome, severe autism, etc.) are granted a special dispensation concerning their moral accountability before God, and they are granted free access to heaven. The command to believe on the Lord Jesus Christ for salvation presupposes intelligence and the ability to exercise one’s volition. Children and those who are mentally disabled lack the intellectual and volitional capacity to make a decision for or against Christ; therefore, they are not made accountable for sin. Lightner states:

“In the Bible, infants, little children, and others who cannot believe are neither told to believe nor expected to do so. They are not classified as wicked evildoers and rejecters of God’s grace. It is always adults who are addressed, either directly or indirectly, regarding these matters. Because the Bible has so much to say about those who cannot believe and yet says nothing about their being eternally separated from God because of their inability, we conclude that they have heaven as their home. They die safely in the arms of Jesus.”[2]

An often-cited biblical passage on this matter is found in the life of King David who lost a newborn son as a result of his adulterous affair with Bathsheba and the murder of her husband, Uriah. David was guilty of horrible sin, but he had a sensitive heart and was very concerned for his child. After the death of David’s son, he said, “While the child was still alive, I fasted and wept; for I said, ‘Who knows, the LORD may be gracious to me, that the child may live.’ But now he has died; why should I fast? Can I bring him back again? I will go to him, but he will not return to me” (2 Sam 12:22-23). While the child was alive, David prayed to God to be gracious “that the child may live.” However, after the child died, David expressed optimism by saying “I will go to him, but he will not return to me.” David was thinking of heaven, where he knew his infant son had gone. Concerning this passage, Lightner states:

“Life after death was a certainty for David. That he would be with his son again in the future was his firm belief. He never doubted that fact for a moment. David was rightly related to the Lord, and he did not question that he would spend eternity with Him. Nor did he have any doubt that his infant son, taken in death before he could decide for or against his father’s God, would be there also. Some people argue that David’s declaration meant merely that he would one day join his son in death. As the child had died, so would the father in due time. But such a view does not account for the anticipated reunion and fellowship with his son that is strongly implied in the statement and in the context. David’s act of worship in the house of the Lord is inexplicable if the death of his son merely reminded David of his own certain death.”[3]

That heaven welcomes little children is stated in Jesus’s Words, when He told His disciples, “Permit the children to come to Me; do not hinder them; for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these” (Mark 10:14; cf., Matt 18:3). Walvoord notes, “The case of those who die before reaching the age of responsibility is a different problem. The proper doctrine seems to be that infants are regenerated at the moment of their death, not before, and if they live to maturity, they are regenerated at the moment they accept Christ.”[4]

In light of these biblical teachings, it is reasonable to conclude that all babies, young children, and those with severe cognitive impairments who die are graciously welcomed into heaven by God. Since they have not reached the age of accountability, they are not held responsible for moral decisions they are incapable of making. This understanding is rooted in Scripture (Deut 1:39, Isa 7:16, and 2 Sam 12:22-23; Mark 10:14), affirming that those who lack the capacity to discern good from evil are covered by God’s grace. King David’s confidence that he would be reunited with his infant son in heaven reflects the hope believers can share regarding children who die. Jesus’ words, “Permit the children to come to Me… for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these” (Mark 10:14), provide further assurance that heaven embraces the innocent and vulnerable.

Dr. Steven R. Cook

If this article has enriched your understanding and walk with Christ, and you feel led to support my ministry, your generosity is greatly appreciated. Your gifts enable me to continue sharing the gospel of grace and providing in-depth biblical teachings. Thank you for partnering with me in this mission.

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[1] Norman L. Geisler, Systematic Theology, Volume Three: Sin, Salvation, 448.

[2] Robert Lightner, Safe in the Arms of Jesus (Grand Rapids, Mich. Kregel Publications, 2000), 15-16.

[3] Ibid., 55.

[4] John F. Walvoord, The Holy Spirit (Galaxie Software, 2008), 135.

The Price of Forgiveness

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Forgiveness comes at a price. Though it may be offered freely to the offender, it always costs the giver something. The word “forgive” translates the Greek verb aphiemi (ἀφίημι), which means to let go, cancel, send away, or pardon. Forgiveness refers to the act of releasing someone from a debt or offense without demanding payment or retribution. For example, in the Gospel of Matthew, Jesus told a parable about a king who had a servant who owed him a great debt of ten thousand talents (Matt 18:23-35). A talent was a unit of weight equal to 75 pounds, and the parable does not specify whether these were talents of silver or gold. If the debt were in silver, it would approximate 372 million dollars (at $31 an ounce); if in gold, it would be worth 32.4 billion dollars (at $2,700 an ounce). When the servant “did not have the means to repay” his debt (Matt 18:25), we are told, “the lord of that slave felt compassion and released him and forgave him the debt” (Matt 18:27). In Jesus’ parable, the king absorbed the loss, essentially forfeiting the massive amount of money owed to him and releasing the debtor from the obligation of repayment.

God Offers Forgiveness

God offers forgiveness to the entire human race who have sinned against Him. His forgiveness is possible because Jesus paid the overwhelming sin-debt we owed to God. Divine forgiveness is available to us because of the great price that Jesus paid when He was on the cross, when He died for the sins of the whole world (John 3:16; 1 John 2:2). Jesus’ death fully satisfied God’s righteous demands concerning our sin, for Jesus “Himself is the propitiation for our sins; and not for ours only, but also for those of the whole world” (1 John 2:2; cd. Rom 3:24-26; 1 John 4:10). The word “propitiation” translates the Greek word hilasmos (ἱλασμός) means appeasement or satisfaction. What John is saying is that Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross atoned for our sins in such a way that God’s anger was appeased by His death. The death of Christ was the sacrifice that satisfied the Father’s righteous demands concerning our sins.

The Price of Divine Forgiveness

Jesus paid the price for our sins. Divine forgiveness of sins is made possible because Christ has already paid the penalty for sin through His substitutionary death on the cross (1 Pet 2:24; 2 Cor 5:21). The blood of Christ was the coin of the heavenly realm that paid our sin-debt, as Peter wrote, “you were not redeemed with perishable things like silver or gold…but with precious blood, as of a lamb unblemished and spotless, the blood of Christ” (1 Pet 1:18-19). That was the price paid for our sins, and it was paid in full on the cross, where Jesus hung between heaven and earth. By believing in Christ, the sinner receives judicial forgiveness as a completed work, not as an ongoing process or conditional reward.

Christians who are already saved are instructed to confess their sins to God on a regular basis (1 John 1:9). This confession pertains to familial forgiveness, which restores fellowship with God as our Father after we have sinned. It is distinct from judicial forgiveness, which occurs as a single event when we trust in Christ and are declared righteous before God as Judge. Judicial forgiveness brings us into the family of God once and for all, while familial forgiveness is ongoing and restores our relational harmony with God (see my article: Two Kinds of Forgiveness with God).

God’s Forgiveness Must be Received

God’s forgiveness must be received by sinners, or the full benefits of the cross are not applied. Though Jesus died for everyone (John 3:16; 2 Cor 5:14-15; 1 Tim 2:5-6; 2 Pet 3:9; 1 John 2:2), the benefits of His work on the cross are applied only to those who believe in Him as Savior. We receive forgiveness of our sins at the moment we trust in Jesus as our Savior. Scripture states that “everyone who believes in Him receives forgiveness of sins” (Acts 10:43b; cf. Acts 13:38; 26:18; Col 1:14). The word “receives” translates the Greek verb lambanō (λαμβάνω), which means to receive, obtain, or take possession of something. The term often implies actively taking hold of something that is offered. In the context of Acts 10:43, the word indicates the reception of forgiveness is a gift from God, something made available through faith in Christ. God is satisfied with Jesus’ payment for our sins and He offers us total judicial forgiveness if we’ll accept His gracious terms and trust in Christ as our Savior.

Jesus is Our Example of Forgiveness

While on the cross, Jesus sought the forgiveness for those who crucified Him, praying, “Father, forgive them; for they do not know what they are doing” (Luke 23:34). Despite His suffering, Jesus displayed a forgiving attitude toward those who hated Him, lied about Him, mistreated Him, and crucified Him. His offenders were not seeking His forgiveness, yet He was willing to give it. By asking the Father to forgive those involved in His crucifixion—including the religious leaders, citizens, and soldiers—Jesus extended grace to His enemies and modeled His own teaching to love and pray for those who persecute us (Matt 5:44). His request for the Father to forgive functions as an imperative of request. Jesus was not demanding that the Father forgive but humbly and lovingly interceding on behalf of His persecutors. His prayer was not a declaration of forgiveness for His attackers, as forgiveness requires personal faith in Him. Only those who believe in Him receive forgiveness of sins, as Scripture states, “Everyone who believes in Him receives forgiveness of sins” (Acts 10:43). Instead, His prayer expressed a desire for their opportunity to receive forgiveness. If Jesus could pray for those who tortured and killed Him, how much more should we forgive others for their offenses against us (Col 3:13; Eph 4:32)? Through this prayer, Jesus emphasizes that God’s grace is greater than human sin.

We Should Forgive One Another

As Christians, we should be predisposed to forgive others. Scripture presents two kinds of forgiveness. The first is unconditional. This form of forgiveness is one-sided. It is extended by the one who has been offended, even when the offender does not seek forgiveness or turn from sinful behavior. Such forgiveness may still include wise boundaries to prevent further harm and to avoid the corrupting influence of an unrepentant offender. Unconditional forgiveness benefits the believer personally, because holding on to resentment is spiritually corrosive. Harboring unforgiveness is like drinking poison and hoping the other person dies. It damages the soul that carries it. The second kind is conditional forgiveness. This occurs when the offender seeks forgiveness and reconciliation. Here, agreement and restoration take place. Conditional forgiveness not only releases the offender from the offense, but also repairs and renews the broken relationship. These two forms of forgiveness parallel the two expressions of God’s grace in Scripture. Common grace is God’s kindness extended to all people regardless of their response to Him (Matt 5:45; Acts 14:17). Special grace refers to the blessings given to those who have trusted Christ as Savior and belong to His family (Gal 3:26; Eph 2:8–9).

The Price We Pay to Forgive Others

When we forgive someone who has wronged or hurt us, we release them from any debt they owe and we absorb the loss or pain into ourselves. They don’t deserve it, but neither did we deserve the forgiveness we received from God. He paid the price for our sin, and it was very costly to Him. And when we forgive, it can be costly to us as well. We forgive others as an act of obedience because God directs us to forgive as He has forgiven us (Eph 4:32). In doing so, we display His grace toward others who don’t deserve it. Forgiveness involves choosing to let go of resentment, anger, or the desire for personal vengeance against the offender, recognizing that God is the ultimate judge (Rom 12:19). Jesus taught that forgiveness should be extended repeatedly, reflecting God’s boundless mercy. When Peter asked Jesus, “Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? Up to seven times?” (Matt 18:21). To which Jesus replied, “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven (Mat 18:22; cf. Luke 17:3-4).

Forgiveness can be especially difficult in situations where the offender is unrepentant or where forgiveness does not lead to reconciliation or restored trust. Forgiving another person is not a denial of the hurt caused, nor does it necessarily eliminate consequences for the offender (such as if he broke the law); however, it is an act of obedience and faith, trusting that God sees and will vindicate the wronged party according to His perfect justice (Psa 37:5-6), “after all it is only just for God to repay with affliction those who afflict you” (2 Th 1:6).

What Forgiveness is Not

Forgiveness does not mean forgetting the offense or erasing its memory. Rather, it involves choosing not to dwell on the wrong or allow it to dominate our thoughts and actions. Similarly, forgiveness does not eliminate all consequences of sin. Even when forgiveness is extended, the offender may still face legal, relational, or other repercussions as a result of their actions (Gal 6:7-8). Furthermore, forgiveness does not equate to enabling sinful behavior. It is not an invitation to tolerate or excuse ongoing wrongdoing, and it may require setting boundaries to ensure protection and accountability.

Forgive and Avoid

Though we are to have a forgiving spirit toward everyone, that does not mean we associate with everyone or allow them into our lives. The reality is that some people are dangerous and can cause us great harm if we befriend them. We can both forgive and avoid some people. There are people committed to a lifestyle of sin who will cause us harm and teach us bad ways if we associate with them. Scripture tells us, “Do not associate with a gossip” (Prov 20:19), and “do not associate with a man given to anger; or go with a hot-tempered man” (Prov 22:24), and “do not associate with rebels” (Prov 24:21). Paul said to Christians in Corinth, “I wrote to you not to associate with anyone who calls himself a Christian who is sexually immoral, or greedy, or an idolater, or verbally abusive, or a drunkard, or a swindler. Do not even eat with such a person” (1 Cor 5:11). And in his letter to the Christians in Thessalonica, Paul wrote, “If anyone does not obey our instruction in this letter, take special note of that person and do not associate with him, so that he will be put to shame” (2 Th 3:14). David wrote, “I do not associate with deceitful men, or consort with those who are dishonest. I hate the mob of evil men, and do not associate with the wicked” (Psa 26:4-5). The wicked are to be avoided, for they “are like the tossing sea, which cannot rest, and its waters toss up refuse and mud” (Isa 57:20).

Summary

In summary, forgiveness is a costly yet essential virtue for the believer, modeled perfectly by God and demonstrated supremely through the sacrificial death of Jesus Christ. Divine forgiveness, freely offered to all humanity, was made possible through the payment of our immense sin-debt by Christ’s substitutionary death on the cross (Rom 3:24-26; 1 John 2:2; 1 Pet 1:18-19). God’s forgiveness is judicial and permanent for those who trust in Christ (Acts 10:43; Eph 1:7). Christians are called to forgive others as an act of grace and obedience, reflecting the character of God (Eph 4:32; Col 3:13). Forgiveness does not negate justice, excuse sin, or eliminate the need for boundaries, but it releases the offended from bitterness and entrusts judgment to God, who is sovereign and righteous (Rom 12:19; 2 Th 1:6). Ultimately, forgiveness demonstrates humility, faith, and trust in God’s perfect justice, allowing us to glorify Him and maintain a spirit of grace even in difficult circumstances. By forgiving others, we follow Christ’s example, embodying His love and offering a testimony of the transformative power of His grace (Matt 5:44-45; 1 Pet 2:23).

Dr. Steven R. Cook

If this article has enriched your understanding and walk with Christ, and you feel led to support my ministry, your generosity is greatly appreciated. Your gifts enable me to continue sharing the gospel of grace and providing in-depth biblical teachings. Thank you for partnering with me in this mission.

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Two Kinds of Forgiveness with God

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ForgivenIn our relationship with God, there are two kinds of forgiveness. One is judicial and the other is parental. Judicial forgiveness is the forgiveness we receive from God when we stand before Him as the Judge of all humanity. This forgiveness occurs at the moment of faith in Christ, where “everyone who believes in Him receives forgiveness of sins” (Acts 10:43; cf. Eph 1:7; Col 1:14). This is a one-and-done event that is never repeated, as we are “forgiven us all our transgressions” (Col 2:13). Parental forgiveness is the ongoing forgiveness we receive from God as our Father and is repeated many times throughout a believer’s life. Judicial forgiveness brings us into a right relationship with Him at the moment of faith in Christ. Parental forgiveness restores our fellowship with Him. Joseph Dillow states, “There are two kinds of forgiveness in the New Testament. One pertains to our eternal salvation (justification by faith), and the other to our temporal fellowship with the Father.”[1] According to William MacDonald, “There are two kinds of forgiveness, judicial and parental. When we trust Christ as Lord and Savior, we receive forgiveness from the penalty of sins; that is judicial forgiveness. When we, as believers, confess our sins, we receive parental forgiveness (1 John 1:9); this maintains fellowship with God our Father.”[2]

Judicial Forgiveness

Kneeling Before CrossJudicial forgiveness relates to our eternal salvation and right relationship with God. Paul wrote, “In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of His grace” (Eph 1:7), and God has “forgiven us all our transgressions, having erased the certificate of debt, with its obligations, that was against us and opposed to us, and has taken it out of the way by nailing it to the cross” (Col 2:13b-14). God’s forgiveness is not arbitrary, as though He simply releases someone from their sin-debt without any payment for the offenses that were committed. The payment for sin was not made by us, but Christ. Peter states, “you were not redeemed with perishable things like silver or gold from your futile way of life inherited from your forefathers, but with precious blood, as of a lamb unblemished and spotless, the blood of Christ” (1 Pet 1:18-19). God’s judicial forgiveness was made possible by the blood of Christ, which refers to His sacrificial atoning death on the cross where He died in our place, where “Christ died for sins once for all, the just for the unjust, so that He might bring us to God” (1 Pet 3:18). The blood of Christ is the only coin of the heavenly realm that the Father accepts as payment for our sin debt. This is the forgiveness we receive because Christ shed His blood on the cross and paid the penalty for our sins. Harold Hoehner notes, “The shedding of blood is necessary (Lev 17:11; Eph 2:13; 1 Pet 1:19) for without it there is no forgiveness of sins (Heb 9:22), and Paul makes it clear that God has been propitiated in Christ’s redemption, which was in connection with his blood (Rom 3:24–25), and that one is justified by means of Christ’s blood (Rom 5:9).”[3] The benefit to us is, “everyone who believes in Him receives forgiveness of sins” (Acts 10:43). This means we are judicially forgiven all our sins, past, present, and future, and will never face condemnation. Jesus said, “He who believes in Him is not judged” (Joh 3:18a), and “he who hears My word, and believes Him who sent Me, has eternal life, and does not come into judgment, but has passed out of death into life” (John 5:24). And Paul wrote, “there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” (Rom 8:1). That’s good news, for we will never face the lake of fire (Rev 20:15). According to Norman Geisler, “Forgiveness does not erase the sin; history cannot be changed. But forgiveness does erase the record of the sin. Like a pardon, the crime of the accused is not expunged from history but is deleted from his account.”[4] Paul Enns adds:

Forgiveness is the legal act of God whereby He removes the charges that were held against the sinner because proper satisfaction or atonement for those sins has been made. There are several Greek words used to describe forgiveness. One is charizomai, which is related to the word grace and means “to forgive out of grace.” It is used of cancellation of a debt (Col 2:13). The context emphasizes that our debts were nailed to the cross, with Christ’s atonement freely forgiving the sins that were charged against us. The most common word for forgiveness is aphiemi, which means “to let go, release” or “send away.” The noun form is used in Ephesians 1:7 where it stresses the believer’s sins have been forgiven or sent away because of the riches of God’s grace as revealed in the death of Christ. Forgiveness forever solves the problem of sin in the believer’s life—all sins past, present, and future (Col 2:13). This is distinct from the daily cleansing from sin that is necessary to maintain fellowship with God (1 John 1:9). Forgiveness is manward; man had sinned and needed to have his sins dealt with and removed.[5]

Though Christ died for everyone (Heb 2:9; 1 John 2:2), the benefit of forgiveness is available only to those who trust in Him as Savior, for “there is salvation in no one else; for there is no other name under heaven that has been given among men by which we must be saved” (Acts 4:12; cf., Acts 10:43). Judicial forgiveness of sins is available to all, but each person must exercise their own volition and turn to Christ, and Christ alone, for salvation. The moment we place our faith in Christ, we are judicially forgiven all our sins—past, present, and future—and receive the very righteousness of God as a free gift (Rom 5:17; 2 Cor 5:21; Phil 3:9). At that moment we are declared righteous in God’s sight for all eternity, being “justified as a gift by His grace through the redemption which is in Christ Jesus” (Rom 3:24), and “having been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ” (Rom 5:1).

Parental Forgiveness

Kneeling ManThe second kind of forgiveness is the parental forgiveness we receive as God’s children who have committed sin and broken fellowship with our Father. As Christians, we continue to live in a fallen world with all sorts of external temptations, and we continue to possess a sin nature that tempts us internally. The sin nature is what Paul referred to when he gave instruction to “make no provision for the flesh in regard to its lusts” (Rom 13:14), and to “lay aside the old self, which is being corrupted in accordance with the lusts of deceit” (Eph 4:22). Paul, as a Christian, described his own struggle with ongoing sin (Rom 7:14-20), saying, “I find then the principle that evil is present in me, the one who wants to do good” (Rom 7:21). As Christians, we constantly deal with internal struggles as along we live in this world, as we have two opposing natures. Paul wrote of this struggle, saying, “the flesh sets its desire against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; for these are in opposition to one another, so that you may not do the things that you please” (Gal 5:17). When we yield to temptation, whether internal or external, we sin, which means we are operating according to Satan’s world-system (1 John 2:15-16), have grieved the Holy Spirit (Eph 4:30), and broken fellowship with God as we are walking in the darkness and not practicing the truth (1 John 1:6). At that moment we are sinning saints, and we are not in fellowship with God. Being honest with God and ourselves is important, for “If we say that we have no sin, we are deceiving ourselves and the truth is not in us…[and] If we say that we have not sinned, we make Him a liar and His word is not in us” (1 John 1:8, 10). When we accept this truth, we can then be humble and honest with God and come before His throne of grace and find mercy (Heb 4:16).

Thankfully, God has made a way whereby we can be restored to fellowship with Him, and that is by means of confession of our sins. John wrote, “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9). Once we confess our sins directly to God, He forgives us, and we are restored to fellowship with Him and ready to resume our spiritual walk by faith and advance to maturity. Concerning 1 John 1:9; William MacDonald states:

The forgiveness John speaks about here is parental, not judicial. Judicial forgiveness means forgiveness from the penalty of sins, which the sinner receives when he believes on the Lord Jesus Christ. It is called judicial because it is granted by God acting as Judge. But what about sins which a person commits after conversion? As far as the penalty is concerned, the price has already been paid by the Lord Jesus on the cross of Calvary. But as far as fellowship in the family of God is concerned, the sinning saint needs parental forgiveness, that is, the forgiveness of His Father. He obtains it by confessing his sin. We need judicial forgiveness only once; that takes care of the penalty of all our sins—past, present, and future. But we need parental forgiveness throughout our Christian life.[6]

If we don’t confess our sins and continue to live in rebellion to God, we are subject to His discipline, for “the Lord disciplines the one He loves, and He chastens everyone He accepts as his son” (Heb 12:6). But this chastening is always in time and does not extend into eternity, for “when we are judged, we are disciplined by the Lord so that we will not be condemned along with the world” (1 Cor 11:32). If we continue in sin, or leave our sin unconfessed, we forfeit eternal rewards (1 Cor 3:10-15; 2 John 1:8), and are in real danger of divine discipline from God (Psa 32:3-4; Heb 12:5-11; 1 John 5:16-17; cf. Dan 4:37), which can eventuate in physical death (1 John 5:16; cf., Lev 10:1-2; Acts 5:3-5). This is avoidable, if we simply humble ourselves before the Lord, confess our sins, and resume our walk with God and advance to spiritual maturity.

In summary, there are two kinds of forgiveness between us and God: judicial and parental. Judicial forgiveness occurs once and is related to our eternal salvation, bringing us into a right relationship with God through faith in Christ (Acts 4:12; Gal 3:26). This forgiveness is made possible by Christ’s sacrificial death on the cross, where His blood serves as the payment for our sin. It results in the removal of the record of sin, ensuring we will never face condemnation or the lake of fire. On the other hand, parental forgiveness is ongoing and pertains to our temporal fellowship with God. It is received through confession of sins to God, as stated in 1 John 1:9. While judicial forgiveness addresses the penalty of sins, parental forgiveness restores fellowship within the family of God. As Christians, we are encouraged to confess our sins continually to maintain our familial relationship with God.

Dr. Steven R. Cook

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[1] Joseph C. Dillow, Final Destiny: The Future Reign of the Servant Kings, 4th Edition (Houston, TX: Grace Theology Press, 2018).

[2] William MacDonald, Believer’s Bible Commentary: Old and New Testaments, ed. Arthur Farstad (Nashville: Thomas Nelson, 1995), 863.

[3] Harold W. Hoehner, Ephesians: An Exegetical Commentary (Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Academic, 2002), 207.

[4] Norman L. Geisler, Systematic Theology, Volume Three: Sin, Salvation (Minneapolis, MN: Bethany House Publishers, 2004), 227.

[5] Paul P. Enns, The Moody Handbook of Theology (Chicago, IL: Moody Press, 1989), 325–326.

[6] William MacDonald, Believer’s Bible Commentary, 2310–2311.

A Godly Mother and Grandmother

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Paul and Timothy     The apostle Paul, during his missionary activities in Derbe and Lystra (Acts 16:1a), met a young man whose name was Timothy. This meeting was according to God’s providence, as the Lord brought these two together to serve in ministry. In the book of Acts we learn that Timothy was “the son of a Jewish woman who was a believer, but his father was a Greek” (Acts 16:1b), and that Timothy “was well spoken of by the brethren who were in Lystra and Iconium” (Acts 16:2). That is, Timothy had a good reputation as a growing believer. It appears that Timothy grew up in a home where his mother was a believer, but his father was not. Paul saw Timothy as a valuable asset and wanted him “to go with him” (Acts 16:3) on his missionary travels to help lead others to Christ. Timothy responded positively to God’s call and was used by the Lord.

Eunice and Timothy     Timothy was a good disciple and helpful minister to Paul, and this because he was positive to the Lord and walked in His Word. But Timothy’s godly life was no accident. He’d been influenced by his mother and grandmother who helped shape his character. Paul wrote to Timothy, “I am mindful of the sincere faith within you, which first dwelt in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice, and I am sure that it is in you as well…and that from childhood you have known the sacred writings which are able to give you the wisdom that leads to salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus” (2 Tim 1:5; 3:15). Timothy’s mother and grandmother had a big influence on his upbringing, which led to his conversion and spiritual growth. The spiritual seeds they’d planted in his young heart sprouted and flourished into a productive spiritual ministry. Later, God used the apostle Paul to help Timothy advance further in his spiritual journey, and Timothy grew to be a blessing to others.

Bible     After years of ministry, as Paul approached the end of his life, he wrote two letters to Timothy, to instruct and encourage him further in his walk with the Lord. Paul directed Timothy, “Be diligent to present yourself approved to God as a workman who does not need to be ashamed, accurately handling the word of truth” (2 Tim 2:15). Timothy needed to study God’s Word for himself, as it would help advance his knowledge of God and His will. Paul told Timothy, “All Scripture is inspired by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness; so that the man of God may be adequate, equipped for every good work” (2 Tim 3:16-17). And, as Timothy advanced in ministry, he was to be faithful to “preach the word; to be ready in season and out of season; to reprove, rebuke, exhort, with great patience and instruction” (2 Tim 4:2). The godly influence that started with Timothy in his home, grew into a successful life and ministry to others.

Jeanette K. Boerner 1930     I am greatly touched by Timothy’s story. As a young boy growing up in southern California, I was blessed with a godly grandmother who taught me the Scriptures at a young age. She gave me what I needed to be saved and to begin my spiritual journey of service to the Lord and others. For that I am very thankful. Of course, what she’d planted at a young age of eight and nine did not come to life and bear fruit until after I was 21 and had lived like the devil for several years. She died before she got to see the influence she’d had on me. But thank God for my grandmother. By the grace of God, the seeds she’d planted came to life, and now there’s been fruit for over thirty years of Christian ministry. The prodigal son came home.

I realize many of you may not have had such a godly family influence at a young age as Timothy did. That’s fine. God has chosen your specific path of life because it’s part of His master plan for you. Your journey is your own, chosen by the Lord Himself. But if you are a Christian and serving the Lord, then someone somewhere touched you with the gospel of grace and Bible teaching, and those seeds of truth are bearing fruit. And now He calls YOU to be a godly influence on others, whether family, friends, co-workers, or whoever the Lord puts in your path. And as a faithful Christian, you are only responsible for your godly output, not the outcome of response by others. You are to let your light shine for others to see and to plant seeds of truth in a loving way, and God will cause the growth in the lives of those you touch, if the soil of their heart is good.

Dr. Steven R. Cook

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